ATTENTION ALL HATERS AND/OR DECAPITATORS! Our inaugural VHS-Worship outing of the VIDEO HATE SQUAD was a rampaging, bone-cracking, marrow-sucking success. The theater was packed and everyone felt their IQ plummet and genitals explode in the searing divine light of VHS-only action epic DEADLY PREY! Well, the Squad is back for a second, equally vicious assault, and we want YOU!
This Sunday, a feast of wildassedness will be visited upon us when the Ritz VCR projectile vomits forth the bounty of holy manna known as NASTY HERO!
Similar to the ancient astronauts who retreated to their stars after blessing us with the pyramids, little is known about the people responsible for this masterpiece. They could be otherworldly…or they could be coked-up assholes. It doesn’t really matter, because when I picture how this film came to be, I can only visualize it rising from a lake like Excalibur. Only instead of a sword, it’s a jewel-encrusted harp of gold, strung with homo-eroticism and tuned by the hand of a 13-year-old boy.
Chock full of villains out of 90210, a parade of outrageously hideous cars, and aneurysm-inducing pop, this is pretty much what it would have been like if Nagel had made an action movie! It shakes the hell out of you like a babysitter with no credentials! Scott Feraco stars as Chase, a man sent to prison for a crime that he didn’t commit. But now he’s back with a metal hand, and – more importantly – he’s NASTY!!! If you have yet to see this VHS-only masterpiece, we’re offering you the opportunity to atone! So DO IT or DIIIIIIIE! (Max)
Tickets are here for ONLY ONE GODDAMN DOLLAR! Get 'em now, or eternally suckle at the withered nipple of regret. Which has little wiry hairs around it. Gross. Get the ticket instead, seriously.